Have you ever reached a point in your life when you felt there was no way out of the deep hole you’ve found yourself in?
I found myself here a long time ago, not by choice, but by being in the wrong place at the wrong time. I can remember it as if it just happened yesterday. This was the day that my doctor told me I would no longer have the use of my legs. I would be paralyzed for the rest of my life.
Laying in my bed wondering what I was going to do, was the moment when my downward free fall started. Worrying about what the future would look like and worrying about how people would react to me in a wheelchair consumed my mind.
At 18 you don’t ever think this is going to happen to you, you’re in the mind set to explore the world and enjoying your young adult existence. Trying to climb your way out of a hole is never in the plans.
You’re left with 2 options; stay in the darkness and fade away or look for strength in the situation that you find yourself in. I chose the easier of the two; to stay in the dark. The dark drove me mad at the world and everything about it. You know you’re there when you no longer can see the light. Many people use the phrase rock bottom. Once I got to this point I knew that I had to make a change, because I wouldn’t have the energy to fight my way out if I went any deeper. I was tired of the misery of life.
It was my awakening, just enough light got me to find enough strength to fight my way out.
I chose to find strength, it first came from looking at my legs and saying “this isnt going to stop me.” I may not be able to move my legs but I can move my arms and my arms will become my legs. Then I found strength by looking at the people around me and trying to not become a burden them. I wanted to find a way to show the world that my life is not a waste, and that it is worth fighting for.
I want to live.
By changing my attitude every day I started to create steps that formed a ladder, and eventually I could pull myself out of the darkness. While I was in the darkness I found that I was never alone, I was just blinded by my hate and fear, I couldn’t see what was always with me. It doesn’t always work out that you can create your own steps to get out, we must help those that are in the dark, by telling and showing them that they are not alone. There is comfort that can be found, and there is hope, even in the dark.
Sometimes the first step forward is knowing that you’re not alone. Now that I’m not in the darkness any longer, I can still see that there are many that need to find the light. Instead of putting my head down and acting like I don’t realize when people need the light, I commit to open my eyes and acknowledging that I’m here to help. There was a time that I felt that there was no tomorrow because I lost the ability to walk. I was wrong that was the beginning of my life transformation.
Romans 13:11-12
And do this, understanding the present time: The hour has already come for you to wake up from your slumber, because our salvation is nearer now than when we first believed. The night is nearly over; the day is almost here. So let us put aside the deeds of darkness and put on the armor of light.
Today I encourage those who have escaped the grip of the darkness to not be blind to those who are still in the dark. Help them to see that their salvation is nearer than they think, and that the light will fade the dark away.
Acts 13:47
For this is what the Lord has commanded us:
I have made you a light for the Gentiles,
that you may bring salvation to the ends of the earth.
Show the Light and Keep Rolling On
