A chair with wheels.
This thing called a wheelchair.

Used by someone who cannot stand. This person has to sit because the ability to stand is not an option. The wheelchair helps a person to move from one place to another. This is how my husband rolls through life.

At the age of 18 God made Sergio take a U-turn on a rocky road, leading him to softer turf. I came along for the ride. At first I wasn’t sure how I would cope with the everyday demands of being in love with a man who is paraplegic. I remember that in the beginning it was tough. I could not show weakness or uncertaties to Sergio. He needed me to be grounded. I was his calm and safe haven during the tough times. I had to learn many new ways to keep life as normal as possible.

One of the first things I learned was how to take apart his wheelchair for traveling. I was slow at first, taking off one tire at a time while pushing the release button. It was hard; hard enough that I had to keep the chair close to Sergio in case I needed his help. Now when we travel and I have to break down the chair to put it in the trunk, I am a pro. I smile when others lovingly try to help me; by the time they make sure that Sergio is comfortable in the car I am done. Like he really needs anyone to baby him with comfort. What does he think he’s handicapped or something? Men especially get a little bent out of shape when their intentions were to help me and I have the chair in the trunk not allowing them to help a girl out. It just comes with practice.

Yes there are some things that are just not possible for Sergio or any person that is wheelchair bound to do and that at times is very frustrating. I have learned through the years to be available to get any job done, not make a big deal about it, and to laugh after I have cried when the task was hard.

When we first bought our home, money was tight and we had to build a homemade ramp. There was no railing and I had to help Sergio by pushing him up the ramp. When the snow came Sergio and I had to devise a plan to get us through the winter.  Sergio would call me when he was on his way home and I would begin to shovel the snow.  If I was running late getting home from work he would wait and stay at his job until I could get home. I would pile the snow to the sides of the ramp because that was quick and easy, I didn’t want Sergio to have to wait in the car for me to clear the ramp.  There were times that getting him in the house was easier then others.

The one winter day I remember the most was when I pushed Sergio half way up the ramp and his wheels caught the ice. He kept trying to force his wheels up, but the ice would not allow them to turn. I tried to give him a good push, but my foot caught the ice right as he wheeled with all his might causing us to fall into the piles of snow to the sides of the ramp. I went to one side he went to the other and the chair flipped backwards down the ramp. I instantly jumped up to my feet but my husband could not. His whole body was in the snow. I grabbed the chair and tried to place it close to him but could not because of the snow, it was too deep, I would have had to wait till spring to get Sergio in the house.

The only way to get him and the chair in the house was for him to transfer himself onto our porch from the pile of snow and then transfer from the porch to the chair. It took three attempts and I had to shove him as he lifted himself. Finally he made it and we both ended up lying on the porch freezing. After I knew that he was okay I started to cry. I tried too hard to help him get into the house safely and I felt tired, cold, and defeated. He let me cry but not for long and said, “I bet our new neighbors saw us and wonder what in the heck we are doing” and started to laugh. I couldn’t help but to start laughing myself. When we realized how ridiculous we looked we knew we needed to get inside. Sergio made more jokes and said, “Come on, Norah, let’s get inside because it’s so cold out here that I cannot feel my legs anymore.” More laughter came as we went into our warm home.

I have so many stories to share about the times that my tears have turn into laughter. I have to remind myself that not very many people can live through what Sergio has lived through. It is a miracle that he is alive. I get excited when I dream of all the adventures that we will get to experience together. Yes there will be more tears but with him they will turn into laughs. God has our back……….As I tread through.

Share with me a story of when your tears have turned into laughter.

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